My Testimony...thus far!

I was requested to share my testimony by a friend of mine. Here is the story, up until now, of how the Lord has worked, sometimes miraculously in my life.


Joel and I met when I was still in high school. I was a senior and he was a 22 year old just recently out of the Army. We met on Dec. 26th 1996 at the movie theater in the town next to my hometown! He was giving me eyes and I thought he was simply gorgeous so after my sister and I sat down and settled in for the movie I went over and asked him to sit next to us, and he said yes! I couldn't believe he would agree but he did! We went out after the movie and talked and I'm ashamed to say made out for a few hours after. We exchanged numbers and he called me three days after our initial meeting.


I did not have a good upbringing...in fact it's as far from how we're raising our girls as you could imagine. Both of my parents are unsaved and my dad struggled with alcohol for my entire childhood, though I wouldn't call him a typical alcoholic...he didn't 'need' the alcohol to function...he got drunk to avoid fights with my mom. My mom is a controlling, manipulative, emotionally and physically abusive person. My growing up was pretty hard, but not as bad as some, for sure. After I graduated high school I moved in with Joel and we attended college together.


Joel knew that living together was wrong and even wouldn't let me answer the phone early on after I moved in because of what his family would think! He got saved on Thanksgiving Day 1980 at the tender age of 6 but had back-slidden from his time in the Army.


We got engaged on New Year's Eve 1998 and in January of 1999 Joel's sister got saved. She'd been an atheist for most of her teen/adult years. She began sharing Christ with me and let me borrow her copy of Left Behind...though now that I know more I don't necessarily agree with the theology in those books, lol! But anyway...I had no idea that a person needed Christ to be saved and reconciled with God. Just before I was saved the Columbine tragedy happened. I read about Cassie Bernal's final moments and was really moved. Her short life impacted mine in a way she could never have foreseen. Christ saved me from my sins on April 25, 1999 at my sister-in-law's church. There was an invitation at the end of the service and I heard the Lord speaking in my mind, obviously not audibly, that I needed to stop running and turn to Him. And I did!


Joel and I were married on Sept. 2, 1999 and I got baptized about a month later. I was not naturally a kind and submissive wife. In fact I was a lot like my mother in the beginning...I used harsh words and picked fights sometimes for no reason at all. But the Lord brought many kind and wise married women into my life to be an example to me. The best piece of advice I ever got just after Joel and I got married was to always speak well and lovingly about my husband in front of other people. That is a fantastic habit, I've found! It especially helps me see and focus on the best in Joel instead of his shortcomings. I also started devouring the Word. I read and read and prayed and prayed and asked our pastor an insane amount of questions about theology and life. The Lord did so much work in me and really softened my heart and showed me how to be a good and virtuous wife for my sweet Joel.


When Joel and I first met I didn't want to have any children, ever. Because I had such a poor example in my own mother, I knew that I would end up just like her and I didn't want my kids to endure what I did growing up. After Joel and I had been dating a while I realized that I did indeed want to have children with him!! Originally, before the Lord convicted us to be quiver full, we wanted just three! LOL! Then after the Lord saved me and the changes started happening in my heart I knew that I would be able, through the Holy Spirit, to be a different and good mom to any children we had.


After we got married we started trying pretty much right away for our first baby. But the Lord had other plans and it took us 4 1/2 years to conceive our Hannah Grace. In that time He showed me much mercy in my attitude and whining about the 'why me's' of not being able to get pg. He moved us to NJ in June of 2002 after Joel's college graduation and in May of 2003 we met the Reproductive Endocrinologist who diagnosed me as having PCOS. He put me on the Metformin and a year and a half later on Thanksgiving morning 2004 we found out about our Hannah blessing! In that year and a half we met a fantastic family who showed us that it is possible to have well behaved children that love and obey their parents and who love and care for their siblings. Thinking about it now, they were like the last piece in a puzzle that the Lord was putting together in my/our lives for the preparatory foundation of our parenting philosophy.


Today we try and parent with purpose and the convictions we feel strongly about. We believe that because we've passed on our sin nature to our girls it is our job to show them and point them towards the cross and towards their redemption. We pray that we will be faithful and successful in this task because, of course we love them, and want to see them on the other side!